Book Review: Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come

Jessica Pan is a self-described “shintrovert” - a shy introvert who finds comfort not in the spotlight, but in the background. All of her life, the prospect of making contact with strangers has seemed terrifying, and extensive interactions with large groups of people have drained her. Pan has never been a “people person,” and she’s accepted that. But in a particularly low period in her life, when she found herself unemployed, and lonely without local friends, she began leaning into her introversion to an unhealthy degree. No longer was her extreme shyness just a part of who she was, it was becoming a crutch.

So, Jessica Pan decided to make a change. Instead of closing herself off to the world, she would let it in. Instead of hiding, she would make herself the center of attention. Instead of saying “no,” she was going to say “yes.” For a whole year, she vowed, she would live as an extrovert…or die (of embarrassment) trying.

Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come is the hilarious, at times cringe-y, true story of one introverted writer’s journey to push herself to new social heights, seeking the guidance of mentors, friends, and yes, even strangers, along the way.

The Good: The best material comes from never holding back, and Jessica Pan makes it clear that holding back was never an option. I loved that she really put herself out there - doing stand-up routines with barely-tested material, going on solo vacations to countries where she didn’t speak the language, even striking up conversations with people unknown to her, pushing through her self-consciousness to make true connections. Throughout the book, the reader is introduced to a variety of different characters, and Pan does an excellent job of giving them all their time in the sun without making it feel like a book of names with a few events sprinkled in. I chuckled frequently, shook my head periodically, and felt totally related-to. Pan’s writing is humorous, witty, and very fun to read.

The Bad: While I appreciate that this book is about an introverted person exploring life as an extroverted person, I feel like the term “introvert” was used to describe almost a completely different type of human. Yes, there are people who identify as introverts, and people who identify as extroverts, and even some who consider themselves “ambiverts” (someone in-between), but I worry that using those words as main identifiers may lead to boiling an entire human’s existence down to how much or how little they enjoy being social. But perhaps this is why she conducted and documented this experiment in the first place - to prove that you can adopt elements of both worlds, while still leaning towards one side or the other, personality-wise.

Bottom Line: Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come is a super-fast, very entertaining read. It’s an especially fun book to read in 2020, when many of us aren’t taking risks to go out into the world. It will remind you of a time when you could just walk up to anyone and leave the conversation knowing a little more than you did before, and possibly with a new friend, or at least acquaintance. It’s also a wonderful reminder of how short life is, how diverse experiences help shape who we are, and how important it is for humans to find common ground, even when it doesn’t seem like there could be any to stand on.

I really enjoyed this book, and I think you will, too!

You can find Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come by Jessica Pan HERE!